Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Adjusting to Korean....everything


Hey Everyone,

Wow, where to start?!? I have had a packed five days.

I left you all shortly before I left for Seoul on Friday. I ended up sleeping for only about an hour…ugh. Well, it was at least better than nothing, which I often do before traveling!

 I touched briefly on my luggage in my last blog. I was very concerned about getting all of my luggage over to Korea. I was checking two very heavy bags, which I thought I would end up with $110 worth of overages, and attempting to carry on a backpack, carry on suitcase and stuff pillow. I thought I might also get a $50 charge for the carry on and be forced to check. Got to the airport and weighed my stuff. My checked baggage was 49.8 and 49.6 pound each!! Checked allowance was 50 lbs, so I just made it in!! I eventually said goodbye to my mom and brother (both brought me to the airport and hung out for a bit) which was very hard. There were definitely tears. But, after that goodbye, I had said my last and I think the emotional lead up to actually saying goodbye is actually worse than being away. With the goodbyes, I was off.

My shit was freaking heavy. My two carry on pieces were 30-40 pounds each. So, in total I had about 160 pounds or so of luggage. I was wearing a purple sweater, had a purple carryon and purple pillowcase, had a purple water bottle and my purple-ness attracted some stares (I’m used to it) and a few comments from travelers and airport staff alike. Such as, “You don’t like purple do you?” or “wow I have never seen so much purple!!!” I took it in stride; I really like purple and I am used to it. A guy later that was a fellow teacher asked if there had been a sale on purple luggage!!! LMAO!!!

I eventually boarded and made it on with all of my stuff!!! I can honestly say, of everyone I saw on the plane, I absolutely, without a doubt, had more stuff than anyone. My extra stuffed pillow full of shit went in my seat with me and my carryon suitcase had to be separated from me to another area of the plane, but it was fine. Korean Air seemed very nice and I was actually (call me crazy) looking forward to the flight! Even though it was scheduled to be 12 hours, I was finally excited. The stress and anticipation of just actually leaving and saying goodbye had melted away. We ended up leaving almost an hour late, but I figured we would make up the time in the air.

The plane ride was horrible. Painful in many ways and too damn long. The flight ended up having horrible turbulence for a very large chunk of the flight, which meant us being buckled in for the majority of the time. Thankfully, I was drugged up on Dramamine or who knows what would have happened! I recently had a sinus infection, which I am assuming wasn’t actually gone, because the pressure in the cabin and the dry air made for an excruciating trip for my sinuses. Horrible pain and pressure and I had really nothing on me to help with it. I spent a lot of the flight with my hands pressed on my sinuses probably looking like a crazy woman. But, that’s ok. I sat next to a girl also going to teach English in Korea. It was fun to talk to her about our fears, excitement and other things. The food on the plane was pretty good. I had very high expectations from what I had read. I requested vegetarian meals and am glad I did, I got American food and the other options were Korean. So, a few ‘last suppers’ so to speak. I forgot to pack snacks and there were definitely times throughout the plane where I was starving. Probably due to the fact I only slept for a two hour chunk on the flight, which ended up being over 13 hours with turbulence. I think nerves just prevented me from settling down. I ended up watching four movies! I watched Avatar (what’s the big deal with that movie?!?), Easy A, Morning Glory (horrible) and It’s a funny story. We eventually landed at 7 pm Korean time on Saturday. I left at 1 pm PST on Friday. 17 hours is a huuuuge time change swing and I would realize in the coming days that not sleeping the night before + only sleeping 2 hours on the plane would make for a horrible transition sleep-wise.

The plan was to meet my recruiter and other teachers all flying in that day from around the globe in the airport. I ended up meeting a guy at baggage claim that had been on my flight and was a part of my group. So, we set off with my ridiculous amount of luggage (don’t worry, I got a luggage cart and didn’t attempt to carry it) to find everyone. It ended up taking us a long time and by the time we got there I was huffing’ and a-puffin’ and sweating ridiculously due to pushing 160 pounds around while wearing a fleece, coat and sweater. I am sure you can get the visual. Something akin to the giant purple people eater.

We met our group (ended up being around 6 Americans) and I instantly recognized someone. I had to do a few double takes and then realized…that I went to graduate school with him!! What a random, small ass world?!?! I didn’t know his name and didn’t know him, but there were only 200 of us at the school and 100 who lived on campus (including he and I). I approached him and asked if he had gone to SIT, and he had! So weird. The world is such a small place!

We left the airport into freezing ass Seoul (complete with snow on the ground) but I had unfortunately stripped my layers and decided to not reapply them and was drenched in sweat. So, I was freezing my ass off outside! I quickly re-dressed and the guys helped me (and made fun of me) with all of my purple luggage. It was, again, quite the hit and conversation starter.

I met a couple on the bus to the hotel from North Carolina that I hit it off with right away. The guy had been teaching in Seoul for two years (John) and his girlfriend (Molly, same age as me) was coming over to teach for the first time from North Carolina. We all got to the guest house as it was called and soon realized it was called a guest house because there were to be 3 people per room. Not ideal, but I can deal. I shared with Molly and another girl, also the same age as us from the states and also here with her boyfriend, named Danielle. The first night, even though we were so exhausted and jet lagged it was hard to see straight, was really fun. As a group we went out to dinner (about 10 of us and our recruiter). They all had Korean BBQ (meat) and I had bimpbop (sp?) which is essentially a bowl of rice and veggies with a raw egg atop. It was quite tasty. Then soju was brought out (a strong hard alcohol which I have heard is very dangerous, similar to vodka, clear and tasteless). I took a shot, went down smooth. I also tried kimchee. How do I describe the cataclysmic reaction I had to kimchee? I am very picky, VERY, to start with. I don’t like weird flavors and have quite the sensitive pallet. But honestly, it was pickled cabbage that was a bit spicy, how bad could it be? Bad. Horrendous. Vomit in your mouth, bad. Since I had just met these people just an hour before I decided to not unleash my craziness upon them and forced myself to swallow. I was gagging. Yes, I am also a baby, but I have a horrible gag reflex. I chocked it down and decided that Kimchee + Kimberly were not going to = BFF. But, I tried. We all went back to the guest house and the two girls and I got to know each other and stayed up quite late chatting. It was a lot of fun.

The next day we had breakfast at the same restaurant and I had..bimpbop, again. Being a vegetarian iin Korea is not super easy. At least  I like Bimpbop! Later, as a group we all ventured into Seoul (airport is outside in a city called Incheon). Thankfully John had lived in Seoul for the past two years so was our personal built-in tour guide. Thank God for John!! The subway system in Seoul is not only massive, but completely daunting and confusing. He got our tickets settled and figured out our journey. I have to say, I had very low hopes for Seoul. I heard it was a literal shit-hole, full of smog and should be avoided at all costs. My first step up to Seoul out from the subway, I was pleasantly surprised. It seemed very clean, modern and cool. We stopped for lunch first (subway ride was about an hour or so) and settled on a Korean restaurant (although we could have chosen Starbucks, McDonalds, KFC or Pizza Hut). I had a delicious buckwheat noodle dish in a vegetable broth. Yummmy! Everyone else had this breaded pork cutlets, which for meat, looked good as well. We then headed to the Royal Palace that was a sprawling, massive compound. It was pretty amazing. Cool architecture and vibrant colors. This is my first time in Asia and it is so unbelievably different from anywhere I have been. I had a bit of sensory overload that first day in Seoul. Trying to take in all the sounds, sights and smells. I kept trying to ‘remember’ things to write here and kept having to force myself to ‘stay’ present in Seoul and just take things as they came. After spending quite a lot of time exploring the grounds of the palace, we headed to a very large market (I can’t remember the name). Ooooh, how I love markets in other countries! They are so exciting, fast and energized. I feel they are the best way to get to know a culture, immediately. Get off the tourist track and immerse yourself with the authentic smells, people, colors and sights of the country and culture. Loved it. Tons of clothes (very tiny) and everything else you could imagine. Including deep fried bananas and hotdogs on a stick covered and French fries, fried. We headed to the higher end shopping district and there were young girls (teens) dressed in animal costumes holding FREE HUGS signs. I was taking pictures and when they spotted me freaked out and got over the top excited and posed. Then I lost the group….who had gone down into the Subway. I panicked for just a second before I saw Molly who realized I was missing and came to retrieve me! We lost a few members of the group in the subway a few more times. The subway is insanity and packed. Busiest one I have EVER seen. It makes Victoria Station in London seem like a stroll in the park. 

We headed back to Incheon to go to the airport (only had half a day in Seoul) to retrieve more teachers and set off for our week long training in our province, Chungnam, which is south of Seoul. We ended up hanging out at the airport for hours. Time went by quickly though and got to know Molly and John a lot better. They are my closest friends here and are awesome. We picked up the stragglers and headed off in a bus to Chungnam.

The ride was long (about 2 hours) and I was so exhausted I hurt, everywhere. I had only gotten about 5 hours sleep the night before, bringing my total to 8 hours in almost 3 days.  We got a goodie bag aboard the bus with books, dictionaries and info on our cities. It was fun! We eventually arrived to this government center (or underground compound, as my recruiter called it and would later realize why) that had housing, dining facilities and classrooms, all in one. It was late and I headed straight to bed. The rooms were doubles with roommates assigned, but mine hadn’t signed up yet. It took me a few trips to get my luggage up 5 flights (thankfully there are elevators). I originally thought I could handle all my luggage on my own, all at once. WRONG!! But, hey, it’s my stuff and I needed it!!

We started orientation bright and early the next day and had my first taste of Korean style cafeteria food….it was, well, bad. But, more on the food later. There are about 50 of us here, about half South African and half American with a small handful of Canadians and Brits. The orientation hours are from 7:00 (breakfast) until 9:00 pm. Long, long, day. That combined with the jet lag, I have become (as have most people) a walking zombie. 17 hour time change is ridiculously hard to adjust to. I have already learned so much stuff about teaching, the schools and life in Korea.  I can’t imagine coming here to teach with no training (lots of private schools are set up with no training for the teachers). So it is good, but demanding and a bit stressful.
We are all housed in a government complex with food and the classrooms are all here as I stated earlier. Why did my recruiter call it an underground complex? Well, turns out, we aren’t allowed to leave, drink and have to be in bed by 11 pm. Plus, we are in the middle of the mountains. Apparently, there were problems in the past with the teachers going out, getting wasted and not showing up the next day for training. Other than the restrictions, it has been a ton of fun, actually. It is like college, except with less alcohol.

The food. Oh, the food. Thankfully, most others are also struggling with it. It is bad. Really, really bad. Primarily (I think) because it is cafeteria food. Most items have meat, so there is very little for me to eat. There is a small bowl of rice at every meal (about 1 ½ cups), sometimes with a few beans thrown in for good measure, raw cabbage, kimchee, a vegetable that tastes like kimchee and meat. So, what do I eat? Primarily, raw cabbage and rice. There have been a few items here and there that I can eat. They make pasta out of squid and fish. All the veggies (which I would eat) taste like kimchee.  There is a little store here, so I have been supplementing my food with cookies and Pringles and granola bars brought from home, all washed down with copious amounts of diet coke to keep me functioning. I know, the diet of champions. But, as soon as a I leave here, it will be better. Let’s hope…Until then, I will be hungry. Oh, and chopsticks. FUCKING CHOPSTICKS! Sorry. Had to get that off my chest. I have been typical white girl in Chinese food restaurants and used silverware my entire life. I had, maybe, prior to coming to Korea, taken/attempted 5 bites of food with them IN ALL MY LIFE. I am going to need, like, a cast from carpal tunnel from these shitters.  I have gotten significantly better and was actually telling someone today how I can actually eat rice with them now, proudly. I have made a lot of progress in just a few days! Before sitting down to eat I feel like I have to loosen up, crack my knuckles and any other thing that would be shown in a warming up sports montage of a movie. Eating is an adventure and needs to be taken seriously here!

There are a significant number of people here who have never been out of the country and the stress and culture shock is starting to hit them all right about now. People have become physically ill from stress and the change. I just keep telling people give the jetlag a week and someday you will laugh your ass off remembering how you were kept prisoner for a week in an underground compound, in the middle of the mountains and ate what you thought was pasta but turned out to be kimchee flavored squid, while being jet lagged, exhausted and worked 14 hours a day. If that doesn’t help, I tell them about my first Europe trip. The whole in a cast, “backpacking” broken suitcase, flat food epidemic. I promise they will laugh, because I know I do now.  Watching these people adjust/freak out is funny in some ways, mostly because it shows me how far I have come and reminds me of a certain night in Prague, going to McDonalds with Kristina and crying our eyes out because we hated everything about Prague and just wanted something familiar (that’s why we went to MCD, but also b/c that’s all we ate, haha). So, I get it, what they are going through. That WTF AM I DOING feeling. And, it passes; that is if you allow it to before packing your shit up and heading home.  And I have to give these people some credit; Korea (in my opinion, after having been to 20+ countries and living in Nicaragua) is a hard place for anyone, let alone first-timers. It is just so, different. Everything about it. The food, the people, the fucking chop sticks, the toilet seats (they are strange and electronic) and just about everything. It is like diving head first into culture shock without a parachute. Shit is a little weird here, but hey so is pumpkin pie, stuffing and other weird shit we do and eat.

I can literally not believe I have only 5 days. My mind can’t even comprehend that. It feels like its been weeks, at least. It is this weird time travel-space and time continuum thing. If you have left the country for large periods of time, you probably understand. The friends I have met here, I feel like I have known for so long. Am already so comfortable around them. 

Also, I fail at learning Korean. F-A-I-L! It is literally one of the most difficult intellectual things I have ever attempted. I will try again, but it makes me feel incompetent. We took a two hour class, I was exhausted which may have had something to do with it….hopefully.

I think that is about it for now. I am sure I am leaving out a million and one things, some intentional some not. In case you were wondering, I still don’t have a roommate and it looks like a bomb has gone off in my room in the form of 160 pounds of luggage. I have already realized what I should have brought more of (dress clothes, *#$&$%&#) and could have done without because American products are here abundantly (lotion). Oh and ps. I shorted out my hair straightener my first morning here. Yay! I plugged it in (to a converter AND adapter) and went psssstt POP! SOB!!!! Well, the SOB is the sound I made, the later the straightener. I also broke my expensive converter in the process….sweeeeetness! So, I get to buy both when I am released from the compound. 

Ok, I think that is all the exciting trials and tribulations of Kimberly in Korea, for now. 

Ok, toodles, love and miss you all!

Kimberly/Aunt TB/Brio/Lez/Kimbo/Kimberguesa/all the other names I go by

PS, will try and post pictures soon, But I am verrrry tired and need to sleep!

Friday, February 18, 2011

And, I'm out.


Well hello there again,

If you haven’t heard yet, I am off to South Korea in the morning. Why you may ask? Well, it is quite the complicated answer, which I will dive into eventually, but the short version is: to teach English. So yes, with that, the blog is back!

It is currently 3:11 am. I get on a plane at 1:00 pm heading towards Seoul. My goal was to be in bed by 2. Well, 2 has come and gone my friends. New goal: 4. The exhaustion has set in and I am dreaming of sleep, but refuse to disappoint you all, so enjoy this entry!!

So, like I said, I am heading to South Korea. I will be teaching English in a public middle school run by the Korean government. It starts with a week long orientation in the province I will be teaching in (Chungnam province, feel free to Wikipedia it up!). Still a bit confused on my *exact* location…so, when I know, I will let you know! 

Just to simplify things, I will answer a few of the many questions I have received in response to my decision to move to Korea to teach. Some have been quite frequent. They are…

Have you ever been to Korea? Negative.
Have you ever eaten Korean food? Nope.
Have you heard of Kimchee, or tried it? Yes and no.
Do you speak Korean? Not a lick!
Are you a teacher? No again! (Starting to see a trend? Lol)
Are you excited/scared/nervous etc…? Yes, all of the above and more.

Reading the above responses, one may wonder, why the hell are you headed there? Well, my friends, like I said above it is a complicated answer. One I am not even sure I have a complete answer for.  As you may or may not know, I finished my master’s degree in Sustainable Development last July and started the job hunt in September…to no avail. I had 8 interviews, applied for a shit-ton of jobs and came up with nothing. Now, many people balk at my mesely 6 month job search. Well, I got sick of it. I felt defeated. Let down. Discouraged. And any other negative emotion you can imagine. So, pretty much, I said fuck it. I am going to Korea. 

That was in November.

In between then and now, I had to apply for a visa and find a job. That has been quite the roller coaster and actually, one of the most difficult and stressful things I have done. In many ways, I have felt like Korea is my last option. If something could have gone wrong with this visa process, it has. It has taken months to get an FBI background check (which was for my visa) which my cat subsequently sat on and got all muddy. I have lost jobs I counted on and which forced me to reconsider the entire endeavor. I didn’t even have a visa (let alone plane ticket) until last week. There have been a few vocal people (you all know who you are, lol) who have said, maybe these are signs, all this stuff, that you aren’t supposed to go? Maybe.  But I decided, if it was meant to be, it would be. The visa gods would align and everything would fall into place. And, it has. So, I am going.

Why else am I going? I am a nomad. It is official. I feel a bit constricted here at the moment and did when I made this decision a few months ago. Being abroad (whether traveling or living) lets me breathe a little easier. I can’t really explain it. You either get it or you don’t. People ask (a lot of people…) don’t you want to “settle down” (whatever that means), get those “things” we are supposed to collect in our “adult” lives (spouses/cars/homes/real jobs/maybe a dog). Well, I guess I walk to a bit of the beat of my own drum. If you really know me, you know I am a bit crazy and live my life that way. And so, I am off.

Is it hard, leaving all the time? All the goodbyes? All the packing? The never being “settled” never having an address that isn’t my own? Of course. Absolutely. But it was just as frustrating feeling like I was sitting around shitting my time away while the interest on my outrageous student loans piled up. The student loans that paid for the Master’s Degree that hasn’t gotten me a job…I feel a bit like I am rambling. Probably because I am rambling and I am exhausted. But also, because the decision to go to Korea was something I struggled with a lot. Am I making the right decision for my career path? Will this set me back? Am I really pushing away the “things” that people want me to have? Is this the right decision? But, I am going anyhow. I think we should do the things that scare us.  They challenge and change us the most.

So, many of my good-byes have been said. And, there were tears. And there were certainly be more tomorrow. It is a part of this life I that have chosen. But, it gets harder every.single.time. The scary thing about going away is that life can change in an instant. It can also change you. If you let it. So, I will board that plan tomorrow (ok, actually today) knowing that life will go on without me here. People will change. Life will move forward. But, so will I. 

Ok, enough with this philosophical and reflective blogging.

Tonight, I have been packing. Correction: this pack week I have been packing. Actually, I packed 3 times and had to start over. You see, I have this problem. No matter how many times I travel and leave, I bring too much shit. I feel like I need everything. Plus, Korean Air has weird baggage allowances, or at least that is what I am blaming it on.  So packing has been quite the adventure. One may wonder, what the hell are you bringing, for a year, in Korea? Before I answer that, I should explain a few things. I know quite a few people who have taught in Korea (and who have loved it, by the way) who have helped me and patiently answered all of my 1,568 questions. They (and many chat boards have recommended bringing clothes for a year (unless you are super skinny, clothes are hard to find), toothpaste/tampons/dental floss/gum/deodorant for a year because It either tastes disgusting (gum/toothpaste) or is very difficult or almost impossible to find, and when found is very expensive (deodorant/tampons/dental floss). Oh, and underwear for a year. So, I have a year supply or so of all of those items.

Here is what else is inside a 25” suitcase, a backpacking backpack (both being checked, nearing 50 lbs), a carry on suitcase and regular sized backpack (both hopefully coming onboard with me):

5 pairs of jeans
Black slacks/black pencil skirt
5-7 pairs of shorts/capris
7-8 skirts
7 sweaters
7 longsleeves
10-12 tanktops
5-7 short sleeves
2 fleeces
1 heavy winter jacket
1 medium short winter/fall coat
My UW hooded sweatshirt
5 pairs of yoga/workout pants/shorts
30ish pairs of underwear
15 bras (regular/sport)
2 flip flops (Teva and crappy old navy ones)
Chaco sandals
Merrell water/trail shoes
Tennis shoes
Black heels
3 pairs of flats
Boots (fake Ugg style)
An assortment of tea
An assortment of granola bars
Jumprope
Resistance bands
Ipod
Laptop
Camera
Digital converter
6 or so books
Lots of pictures (to decorate my room and show people)
4 scarves
Lots of socks
And a lot of other random shit

Ok, my eyelids are getting heavy. I think it is time to say goodnight. If I did not get a chance to say goodbye to any of you before going, then know I wish I could have! If you were able to come out to my birthday or see me recently, thank you, I appreciated it and liked having the chance to say goodbye to so many of you. Saying goodbye for me is very hard. The last 6 or so hours packing, writing and cleaning, I have been listing to Ingrid Michaelson and at times have gotten very emotional. It can’t be possible that I am leaving for an entire year and won’t see any of your faces for that long. It is hard. But, I know I can do it. For those of you struggling with my departure, know that I am also struggling with leaving you as well, and probably more so and will miss you more than you can even fathom.

I came across this quote in a travel memoir book today that I read years ago and it really resonated with me. I feel like it articulates much better than I can how I feel:

“There are times when I'm traveling, when I'm far from home, that I am so forlorn that I can't remember why I chose this particular profession. I yearn to be home so fiercely that I feel as though my heart will pop out of my chest. And then I step out and see the world spreading out around me. I know where I'm heading: I am heading home. But on the way there, I see so many corners to round and doors to open, so many encounters to chance upon, so many tiny moments to stumble into that tell huge stories, that I remember exactly why I took this particular path. The journey begins again; the story starts over; I gather myself and go out to see what I can see and tell it as best as I can, and the beckoning of home is always, forever, there, just over the next horizon.”  -Susan Orlean

Here are two more of my most favorite travel quotes:

"Lives of Wander: Sometimes the showers are dirty & the bus breaks down. Sometimes you don't understand a word being spoken. Sometimes you wonder why you do this, why you go rather than stay, why you care more for wings than roots. But then you remember that you don't have a choice. You were born to wander, to explore, to always wonder just what is waiting over the horizon. And most of the time, it's pure exhilaration & unexpected discovery. It's life just the way you want it. It's a life of wander."

"Traveling is the great true love of my life. I have always felt...that to travel is worth any cost or sacrifice. I am loyal and constant in my love for travel, as I have not always been loyal and constant in my other loves. I feel about travel the way a happy new mother feels about her impossible, colicky, restless newborn baby-I just don't care what is puts me through. Because I adore it. Because it's mine. Because it looks exactly like me. It can barf all over me if it wants to-I just don't care" -Elizabeth Gilbert; Eat, Pray, Love

So, there will be stories. There will be adventures. And you can be sure they will all show up here. Part of the reason I write about my experiences abroad is that it is my way of connecting with the rest of you and bringing you into what I am going through. Plus, sometimes my life is just crazy and it deserves to be shared because it is funny.

Let the wagers begin. Will I starve? Will I eat nothing but Kimchee? Will I know how to teach? Will I ever come home? Will I endure some crazy medical or physical crises? Who knows. What I do know and have particularly learned in this past year is that you can’t control life, much less predict it.

Let the adventure begin. I am ready.

I miss you all already. Find me on skype!

If you don’t see an update from me in a while, don’t fret, I am just in orientation!

Love always,

Kimberly

Oh look, its 3:53 am, perhaps some sleep is in the cards for me.

About this blog

Just an fyi....

All previous posts on this blog were written between 2006 and 2009 and were sent out via email, facebook or another blog I used to have while living in Nicaragua.

I decided that it was time to compile them all in one location, so here it is! They all have dates of February 2011, but the dates next to the titles were the original dates they were written.

Note: I have not changed these AT ALL from original writing. There is a ton of spelling errors due to international unfamiliar keyboards, fast typing and not paying attention and not bothering/being too lazy to spell check.

If you're new here be forewarned, I let shit fly, including the language. So, if that offends you, consider yourself warned ( :

Thanks for reading! Enjoy!




SCUBA Diving and Panamian Adventures! December 7, 2009

So my last blog update left off with me in Bocas del Toro, Panama learning to SCUBA Dive. Bocas is an archipelago of islands on the Caribbean side of Panama. We got to Bocas from Managua, Nicaragua originally and took a bus to San Jose from Managua where we overnighted because Managua-San Jose was already an 8 hour bus ride, so we split it up in San Jose, Costa Rica and left the next morning for our remaining venture to Bocas.

As soon as we crossed the Nicaraguan/Costa Rican border the differences were striking and apparent. I have been to Costa Rica before, so I knew how developed the country was, but after living in Nicaragua, it is crazy. It is an entirely different world. Costa Rica is looking more and more like America (I was there about 18 months ago and it looks even still more different now then then.) The differences in money, standards of living, infrastructure and everything else you can think of are so different between the countries. I was just blown away. Olivia and I spent some time in downtown San Jose that night and just enjoyed being in a big city, it was crazy after all that time not being in a big city. We went back to the hostel early after an extremely hard time of not being able to get back because literally no taxis knew where it was. We literally had to go from taxi to taxi asking, in the dark, getting darker, and finally a nice guy helped us and said we would find it together, and we did! Once back I went through all of my stuff and got rid of a ton of shit. My bag was way too heavy (probably around 50 pounds) so I unloaded a lot. I have this bad habit of packing WAY too much, you think I would learn by now....

The next morning we took a bus from San Jose (or the plan was) to a city that we were supposed to connect with a water taxi, to take us the rest of the way to Bocas. When we got to the Panamanian/Costa Rican border, there were a young guy who was on the bus with us who had lost his passport and had a new one sent from Canada, but it had been inadvertently stolen/lost in the mail, so he had been issued a temporary one by the Canadian embassy in Costa Rica. Problem was, when he got to the border, someone had crossed that border with HIS passport. So they wouldn't let him over. Well, I felt really bad for him, but since we were all on the same bus together, the bus wouldn't leave without him.....a 20 minute border crossing turned into a 2 hour plus border crossing, in the pouring down rain. They eventually let him over, but by the time that happened, we were told we would not make it to the last boat in time to get to Bocas that night. So a taxi driver took us and 12 others from the bus (we were insanely packed in) the rest of the way insanely fast. I don't think I have ever driven so fast in a car, and it was pouring down rain and it was extremely windey up in the mountains. I was freaked out the whole way as was everyone else. We eventually got to the taxi literally 5 or so minutes before it left and were on our way to Bocas. We got to Bocas, found a hostel and decided we would only stay there that night because it was literally the shittiest, dirtiest, nastiest, loudest hostel we had ever stayed in. I literally had shit growing from my bed, these nasty looking dangly things....I was on the bottom bunk and they were growing towards me. Ewwww!!! There was also a bar at the hostel, so the place was literally shaking from it being so loud, and we had to get up at the ass crack of dawn for our SCUBA class, needless to say, we didn't get a lot of sleep that night.

We woke up very unrested the next morning, found a very nice hotel with AC for the same price! We then went to our first SCUBA class. SCUBA diving is something I have ALWAYS wanted to do in my life and I was really excited. We had to fill out medical paperwork to SCUBA of course and I marked that I have asthma and that I get seasick/motion sickness. Then the instructor said if anyone marked any boxes they wouldn't be able to dive without medical clearance, so he said we could unmark them if we wanted. He asked if my motion sickness/asthma is a problem and I'm like nah, not really a problem, hardly ever happens.. Biggest lie of my life! Probably wasn't the smartest move, but I really wanted to dive. You should all probably know by now, my motion sickness is EXTREME. I get sick on swings. Seriously. And I have very bad asthma as well. Fortunately though, I had no problems the entire time! So, I was really excited to dive, but as we were talking to the instructor and in class my anxiety level started to rise and rise. Especially after we found out we would be going underwater within two hours of the start of our class! TWO Hours?!?! I was freaking out! But low and behold, about 90 minutes within the start of the class we were being fitted with gear (there were two other American guys with us in the class and our instructor was an American) and told of the things we were going to have to do underwater. These things included: Flooding our masks with water and then getting the water out again, changing our respirator to back up sources, which involves taking the respirator out of your mouth, continuously blowing bubbles until your secondary source or your buddies secondary respirator is back in your mouth and last but not least, having our oxygen turned off underwater and NOT being allowed to panic. YAY! I was really excited. Not. I was freaking out. As we got to the bottom of the water (we were only about 15 feet down, but in the ocean) I was like WTF am I doing?!?! Humans do not have gills for a reason!!!! I was watching everyone else and I was like why can't I be as calm as them, they are doing their skills so well!!!! When my oxygen was turned off (you have about 3 breaths from when its turned off until its gone) as I was breathing my last breath, waiting for the moment when I try to exhale and get nothing, I was really starting to panic. I unknowingly exhaled my last breath, went to inhale another and....NOTHING! I cannot describe the feeling. Unless you have SCUBA dove before or for some other reason had no oxygen source, being without oxygen is a very strange abnormal feeling. It feels like your lungs kinda shrivel up and someone is sitting on you and you are choking all at the same time. I don't really know how else to describe it lol. But it was scary and is definitely not a way I would want to go. When he first told me our oxygen would be turned off I kind of freaked out and was like how long EXACTLY will it take for the oxygen to come back on?!!? He was like once its off, I can turn it back on instantly, don't worry. The test was just so you know 1.) What it feels like to not have oxygen and 2.) Showing you can handle that. Well, I survived all of those skills but was like, yaaaa I can't do this. SCUBA is not for me. I'm not coming back. We broke for lunch and after talking to Olivia and the other guys they all thought the same thing, I thought I was the only one panicking!!! That made me feel better and I decided to come back. That afternoon we went on a dive (an actual dive, to about 45 feet) and it went much better then the morning. After a full day of class and dives (about 8 hours) we went home to study and read a 400 page book that we had to finish by the next day. So we did A LOT of reading and homework.

The next day we had more class and diving in the morning and had to do all the skills we did the previous day in the 15 feet of water in 30-40 feet of water in the open ocean, plus other skills like completely removing our mask and having to swim 30 feet of water on one breath of air. The skills were scary again, but I did much better and passed them all. We broke for lunch and in the afternoon went out on a fun dive without having to do any skills which was really fun. We descended through a field of thousands (literally) of moon jellyfish, thankfully they don't sting, but I was still a little freaked out swimming through them, but it was pretty amazing. After the second day I knew that I could finish the certification and wanted to, I just had to let go of the panic and fear. But Olivia and I were both worried we wouldn't pass the final written test! We went home after our afternoon class and studied until 2 AM, crazy for SCUBA! I felt like I was in school again, haha. The next morning, we took our test and we all passed! Went on our final dives, did our final skills and we were all certified!! It is really exciting since it is a life long goal I have had and now can dive anywhere I want to!! On our dives we saw lots of different fish, coral reefs and a ship wreck! The diving in Bocas wasn't amazing (snorkeling in Belize was better) but I am excited for future diving around the World! Walking on the dock one day I got an enormous piece of wood shoved into my foot (like a huge sliver) so I have had to have my foot wrapped up for the past few days. I have really bad luck/am really clumsy when it comes to injuries, it sucks!!

After 3 days in Bocas, and literally only diving, sleeping and eating there, we set off for Panama City by bus. Oh what a journey that turned out to be. We had to take a water taxi to shore and then a taxi to catch the bus. So, my bag is VERY heavy, still, even after I have chucked a bunch of shit out. I always warn people before they try to huck it around, but its always men and they're always like oh ya ya ya, no problem, then go to pick it up and are like uhhhhhhhh soo heavy!! A guy picked up my bag from the boat and then almost dropped it between the boat and dock! Thankfully someone caught it in time. Literally two minutes (or less) later, the taxi driver threw up my bag onto his van, missed, and then my bag rolled and bounced down a huge hill towards the ocean, three guys chased it and somehow, miraculously caught it inches from the water. But not before it was covered in mud. Sigh, my life traveling!! haha. Thankfully, nothing was broken though, my bag is just a little dirty. We got on the bus finally and it stunk SO bad. It was supposed to be 7 hours to Panama City but it somehow turned into 12, awesome! In the final minutes of the bus ride literally, a woman started throwing up right next to me, and though I felt bad, literally having been in her place before, I was freaking out because me+puke+sounds of puke usually=me puking. I was gagging and had my mouth/nose covered but it was a hard last few minutes. But, I made it out ok! We got in a taxi, went to the hostel that we had a reservation at, only to find out they were full. Awesome!! We had to get back in a taxi and go around to a bunch of other places asking prices and etc.. Finally got a hostel and immediately went to sleep without dinner after our crazy day of 14 hours of traveling.

The next morning we got up and went return our tickets that were to take us back to Nicaragua by bus from Panama City. I don't think I've mentioned it yet, but I changed my ticket to come home a week early leaving from Panama City instead of Managua, Nicaragua. I did it for many reasons, but mainly because all of a sudden, I just got a feeling that I was ready to come home. I can't really explain it but I immediately went and changed my ticket when I thought that. Anyhow, so we had these Ticabus tickets (think Greyhound) that we had to return and we had to go to this mall/transportation hub to do so. When we got there, we were told they would have no money for about 5 hours or so, so we decided to go to the mall! Now this mall is no ordinary mall, this mall is the biggest mall I have ever seen/been to in my life. It was utterly overwhelming. I hadn't been in anything bigger then a small convenience store size store since August, so it was pretty crazy. And it was PACKED with people, wait till you see the picture, it was insane, like body-to-body contact while walking. We shopped for a few hours, got our tickets refunded and then headed to an area of the city called Casco Viejo, an older area of Panama City. It immediately reminded both of us of Southern Italy or Portugal, it seriously felt like we stepped into Europe! It was pretty crazy and really made me miss Europe! It was so beautiful and is this littler peninsula that juts into the water so is surrounded on all sides by water. I made the mistake of setting my Central American guide book down for a second and then it was long gone. Sold into book slavery is my guess. The little stall we were at told us to check the book stall to buy it back...I think not. We think he took it and sold it. Sounds bad, but is a very common thing to happen down here. Oh well, at least it was the end of my trip anyhow. After spending the afternoon in this area of Panama City, we made our way back to the mall to watch the Twilight movie New Moon!! I was so excited since I have been waiting to see this thing forever. The movie was ok, the books are WAY better.

Today we went to the Panama Canal! It was pretty exciting to see it in action, but after seeing it do it's thing once, the coolness wears off pretty quickly. Especially since I have seen the Ballard Locks in Seattle numerous times, it just wasn't as exciting. Its definitely one of those once in a lifetime things that you can say you've done but really don't need to repeat. Randomly, while in line to buy tickets, I turned to Olivia and go, is that guy Jeff over there?!?! Jeff was literally the first person I met and hung out with in Nicaragua back in August and was at our Spanish school. She was like, I think so?!? So I was like JEFF! And he answered. Crazy shit. What a small world, three months later, we see him again in line for the Panama Canal?!? What are the odds. It is stuff like that which make me love traveling. Crazy experiences that just don't happen outside of traveling it seems. So we ended up hanging out with him all day. It is weird, because the three of us started out together in Granada, and in our second to last day here, came back together. It was just weird, but cool. We later saw some ruins in the city, which weren't very cool after seeing Tikal in Guatemala. Tonight we are heading out for a nice dinner and tomorrow (our last full day in Central America) we are planning on getting massages, finishing up souvenir shopping and just taking it easy.

We leave early AM on Wednesday (about 36 hours from this writing) and its very surreal to be going home after all this time. At times I feel that I have been gone for forever, other times just weeks. I am ready to be home though and am excited for Christmas, family and friends. I could do without the cold weather though, lol. Look for another blog recapping things after I come home, I hope you all have enjoyed this journey with me. Thanks for reading. SEE you all very SOON!

-Kimberly